Adventured.net

Ankhs in the Ground

Saturday, November 15th, 2008 | Thoughts | 7 Comments

Premise: For Halloween I dressed up just a little gothy.  However, I was missing one vital accessory for my outfit: my ankh necklace.  I knew I had one somewhere, but the where was eluding me.  I couldn’t recall the last time I’d worn it or the last place I’d seen it.  I considered searching in the bedroom, though even that seemed pointless.  Had I brought it to New York with me at all?  My memory was failing me, as is often the case, so I didn’t give it much more thought until the mystery unraveled in a morbid thought process this morning.

Lying in bed in Texas, I was awoken by my dad bringing in Justin’s cell phone. The alarm was going off.  It was 8:30 AM in NY, 7 :30 here.  I considered getting up after only 4 hours of sleep to walk down the street and see my grandmother (Nanny), a ridiculously early riser.  I’d spoken with my cousin Sheila the night before; she told me she and her husband (Justin) were going to have breakfast with Nanny at 7 AM.  Yeah, right.  Sheila is notorious for consistent inconsistency.

The thought occurred to me of playing a terrible practical joke on Sheila - pretending Nanny had died by getting there before her, conspiring with Nanny and hiding her, and basically lying through my teeth when Sheila arrived.  Obviously, this thought process got me thinking of how sad everyone would be if Nanny were to die for real and how devastated my cousin David would be.  How devastated I would be.

Thoughts leading on to other thoughts, I remembered the last time someone incredibly important to me died.  It was Dec. 2005 and the neighbor I’d had and helped raise (he was 6 years younger than me) and played with practically my whole life committed suicide. His mother found his body hanging in his closet.  I remembered going to his wake and half-hoping in that ridiculous manner that people do when they don’t want to believe reality that it was all an elaborate ruse and Jared would call it off at any moment.  Val! and I swore we wouldn’t be angry if he’d planned the whole thing as some gigantic practical joke, or even just some way to prove to himself that lots of people cared about him (people came out en masse - it was incredible to see the number of lives this young guy had touched).  I lost it as soon as I saw his lifeless body in the coffin.  Even from the entrance of the chapel, it was apparent the spark that was Jared’s being was gone forever.

I remembered that I’d dressed Goth that night and for the funeral the next day in honor of Jared.  It was something he used to tease me relentlessly about, even though he always conceded to letting Valerie and I dress him up and put makeup on him. It was at this moment that it struck me where my ankh was.  As I approached Jared’s coffin the day of his funeral to say my final goodbye, I ripped my ankh from around my neck and laid it on his chest.  Strange how we’re driven to do symbolic things, like adorning a corpse with a necklace before sending it into the ground forever, as a way of saying goodbye.  Utterly pointless but entirely human.

Mystery solved.  I wonder what it was about this thought process, this story, that drove me to get up at 7:30 AM after a mere 4 hours of sleep and type it up to share with my poor readers.  I feel a little guilty about it, because spreading misery is not my goal, but it seemed important, even interesting, to me.  I guess revelations and understanding are interesting to me.  Anyway, I am going to lay down and try to go back to sleep.

Follow Up:  I didn’t want to leave any of you guys hanging as I am sure you’re on the edge of your seat wondering, “Did Sheila show up at 7 AM this morning at Nanny’s house?!”  Like a good author and fact-checker, I just got off the phone with Nanny.  Sheila did not show up afterall.  Justin left a message saying something about abdominal pain (she is pregnant - sounds like a good reason).  I guess it’s good to be able to bank on the actions of someone you know pretty darn well.  Nanny did, however, make Schmawn* in the anticipation of Sheila and Justin’s arrival.  Don’t worry guys - my Justin and I will take care of it for you.  Good morning all.

* Schmawn is pancake mix + oil stirred constantly over heat in a big pot til there are tiny cooked pancake crumbles.  Served in a bowl covered with syrup.  Oh deliciousness.

Tags: Family, goth, Jared, suicide, Texas, Thoughts

4th Anniversary - Roundtrip to Polanda via Vienna

Saturday, October 11th, 2008 | Adventure, Family, Photography, Travel | 3 Comments

As some of you already know, Justin surprised me with a trip to Poland for our fourth anniversary.  While we did things tourists are typically expected to do, such as visiting Castle Wawel and snapping photos in Rynek Glowny (the grand square) in Krakow, and strolling through Stephansplatz and along the Danube Canal in Vienna, the primariy purpose of our visit was so that I could experience, first hand, the land of my ancestors.

For a time I’ve been working on a family website based on research my great aunt,

Sister Mary Elizabeth Jupe, did that traced the roots of my father’s family all the way back to the 1600’s in Silesia, Prussia in Germany (when our last name still had both its p’s: Juppe).  That region has since become part of Poland. For our trip, Justin and I had one night in Nysa, one night in Krakow, and one night in Vienna.  Nysa is, consequently, the region where my ancestors are from.  The towns that are significant follow: Deutsch Wette, Neissa/Nysa and Lindewiese/Lipowa - German and Polish names respectively for the areas that are still in existence.

It was definitely an interesting experience, though I wish we’d had longer than 3 days!  I also wish the weather had been more agreeable and that I spoke a little Polish.  :)  It was surreal to step foot into a church that some of my relatives were married in and another was christened in more than 2 centuries ago.  It was also sad, because there is practically no German influence left in the area.  I say practically, because there were still one or two German inscriptions adorning plaques within the beautiful church.  Check out our seemingly endless supply of photos from Poland and Vienna.

Tags: Adventure, austria, europe, Family, heritage, krakow, life, Lipowa, Nysa, Photography, poland, travel, vienna

Sept. 11th - almost a freakin’ decade

Friday, September 12th, 2008 | Negativity | 4 Comments

I am posting what I wrote the morning of Sept. 11, 2001 here because of Matt’s post.  in years past I’ve gone into detail about how the rest of the day went, but I won’t right now.  I’ll let it be a time capsule, untainted by modern interpretations.

Read and get a glimpse into my mind and my life at 21 as a senior in college:

Tuesday, September 11, 2001

8:45 AM

A call this morning from Mike’s mom, and we turn the TV on, in time to see the third plane crashing into the 2nd World Trade Center, in time to see the first disappearing in a puff of smoke, and hear, finally, that one of the planes was an American Airlines plane hijacked from Boston. My first thought, “Thank goodness Dave and Rob don’t really fly out of Boston - They’re international…” My second thought, “But Sheila ISN’T!” I immediately get on the phone to call Sheila. Her voice is raw from crying. She is okay - at home in San Antonio. David was in Chicago about to take off, and Rob was safe at home. Thankfully, all outgoing flights have been canceled, and everyone I care about is safe.

I hang up and start bawling into Mike’s shirt. Eventually I compose myself, temporarily. He runs to school and I call my mom, who is very concerned about me, and is thankful and relieved to hear Sheila is safe and in town. She called Robert first. His cell phone is not working, possibly because the Trade Center Tower #1 has fallen. Suddenly, the second tower collapses into a heap - a pile of dust. I start crying and mom is concerned. She tells me I may be wrong. She can’t believe the whole thing is gone - fallen into a pile of dust. How odd, it seems, when only the top was destroyed the whole thing would crumble. I wonder what they will build there now.

I don’t want to go to school. I want to be with my family. I want to hug Sheila because she is still here; she is ok, thank god…

So the Pentagon was crashed into and the State Dept. was bombed (car bomb). Shade says, “but this means war in our lifetime Ness…this is worst we’ve seen.” and I suppose he’s right. After all, we need something to boost the economy, right Mr. President? I don’t want to believe it was an “inside job.” I don’t want to believe this has happened, period.

I’ve got to go… School starts in 30 minutes, after all.

Tags: Family, memories, September 11th, tragedy

Awesome Photos: N-E-S-S

Sunday, September 7th, 2008 | Family, Fun | 7 Comments

Val!, Karen and Mike were all hanging out last night as Val! is visiting Texas. They went to dinner with Mom and Dad and then sat around reminiscing and just randomly chattering.  I asked Mom to take some photos of them, at which point she said they had taken a group shot before they left.  I told her to tell them to take some Lyrael.com style photos and to mention “letters” and “Tab” to them.  Now, to those of you new readers of this site (new as in the 6 years, woe is me), you surely don’t know what I mean.  Back in 2002, Karen, Val! and I became quite creative (and silly) when it came to taking and uploading photo sets.  I hoped they’d want to do something goofy that hearkened back to those good times.  Sure enough, they did!  For your viewing pleasure, here are the two photos Val! has sent me so far:

Love you guys!!! And I miss you! XO XO

Nessy

PS: If anyone out there wants to take silly photos and email them to me, that’d be awesome too! :)  Maybe we can get Peanut in on the action… She kinda looks like she is “E” shaped in the photos below. :)

Update: Another one!  I love this one! The lighting is great! Look how long and pretty Karen’s hair is!  I definitely dig everyone’s expressions on the “N” here.

Tags: Family, Fun, photo editing, Photography, Val

Baby on Board - My Cousin is Pregnant!

Wednesday, September 3rd, 2008 | Family, Positivity | 4 Comments

I am so glad that my awesome cousin Sheila is pregnant!  I doubt I’ll ever have a child and Val!’s pretty much in the same boat, so this is the closest I’m going to come to being an Aunt… well, Aunt-Like. Ok, a really cool cousin. :P

I am just so darn excited about “Peanut” Roan!!!  Sheila sent sonogram photos out to the family yesterday.  I am sharing them here, now.  I wish I could tell you more, like how she is feeling (I think a little nauseous!) and what she is thinking (yay baby!), but I can’t… she hasn’t updated her website.  :P

In these photos, you can make out little numbs that represent Peanut’s appendages!  We don’t know whether Peanut will be a girl or a boy. Mommy and Daddy (Sheila and Justin) supposedly want to wait til the baby is born, but we’ll see if they can stave off their curiosity.  Personally, I am hoping Peanut is a girl, but I’ll love it either way. ;)  Congratulations She and Justin!!!

Tags: baby, Family, Photography, pregnancy, Sheila, sonogram

Housewarming in Austin, the Ride Back to NYC, Anonymity

Monday, August 4th, 2008 | Family, Photography, Puppies, Travel | 3 Comments

Justin and I enjoyed Texas! We went to Sheila and Justin R’s housewarming party (which was actually also a birthday party, though we hadn’t realized that beforehand - our bad! Sorry Justin R!!!). It was cool to see them, their friends, and some of my relatives again. I must say, they also fed us some DELICIOUS BBQ and sides. Yummy! Aunt Sha Sha, Uncle Wayne, and Aunt Debbie all came up. Aunt Linda and Leanne (my 1st cousin) were in attendance as well, and ended up spending the night, which turned out to be very cool because we were able to sit around and talk this morning (photos of puppies new haircuts and the morning at Sheila and Justin’s). One takeaway - I definitely need to visit Leanna in Longview. She’ll be out of school before I know it, and I’d really like to see her in her college element, visit her apartment, and be a part of this brief, though significant period in her life.

It was also a really good onslaught of socialization for the puppies as Leanne brought her chihuahua, Pixie; the neighbors brought their poodle, Apricot and their labradoodle, Pinky; a gigantic chocolate lab was there (I don’t recall his name) and of course, Sheila and Justin’s very own Brodie was running around. Ruby and Eve got lots of sniffs from the other dogs and petting from the people. :)

On a random side note, one very pretty, well-dressed girl with expertly curled blonde hair told me that she really liked my hair and thought I looked like a certain actress. I was actually taken by surprise as I never expected a compliment at all (been spending too much time in NYC!). Now, waaaay back when, I was told frequently that I looked like this actress and once, upon entering a Chili’s, the hostess refused to believe that I wasn’t this actress…. Hello, I was in Chili’s in San Antonio, for crying out loud. I personally have never thought this actress was attractive, but the gal that paid me the compliment last night thinks she is very pretty and sexy, so I am taking it in a positive manner. ;) I am sure you’re wondering about this actress. *sigh* She’s the goofy girl from Scary Movie: Anna Faris.

Sheila drove Justin and I to the airport and Linda, Leanne, and Pixie rode along. It was amazingly nice to be surrounded by good conversation (though somewhat heavy subject matter) and loving goodbyes and hugs as we departed. As we were hugging goodbye, we ran into Shelley from JetBlue and got to hang out with her a little pre and post flight, which was awesome.

On our flight back to NYC this afternoon, I had the good fortune of sitting next to a fascinating woman. I want to say her name was Rebecca, but I am terrible with names, so I am probably wrong. She is originally from Ireland, though lived and worked in NYC for a long, long time. She majored in fashion and spent 2 years working for Geoffrey Beene and another 8 years working for Ralph Lauren at which point she decided to ditch her fashion career entirely and backpack around the world for 3 years. Did you catch that? Yeah, she backpacked ALONE around THE WORLD for THREE YEARS! She ended this backpacking stint in Madrid, where she spent six months learning Spanish and subsequently met her husband as he was enrolled in the same language program. Well, not only did they meet, but the program placed them as roommates in the same apartment. Was it fate? He was an engineer/international business major from Austin, Texas that decided to take some time off and spent half the year learning French in France and half the year learning Spanish in Spain. Hmm… Sounds like a great idea to me. I don’t know his career history or anything, but they both sound like super interesting people. Now, they spend half their summers primarily in New York (Westchester) and winters in Austin. I like their setup. They’ve also started their own business, which is doing pretty well I gather. Anyway, of course I know most of this because I asked her loads of questions, but it was really fun getting to know her. It turns out we were both in Madrid at the same time - when the trains were bombed! What are the chances?! I hope our paths cross again sometime, because she was a nice, fascinating lady and I’d love to hear more of her stories. She recommended I watch a show on the National Geographic channel called “Locked Up Abroad.” It sounds interesting, but so depressing judging by reading a couple of the summaries.

On a side note, Val! sent me an article today that got me thinking “How public do I want to be with my life?” A lot of recruiters, and certainly the last few of my employers are testaments to the truth of this statement, Google you and look you up on MySpace to see if they can find any dirt, legitimate or not, to disqualify you as a potential job candidate. Now I need to decide between entirely censoring myself (mmhmm) or maybe just posting elsewhere with a nom de plume. Not sure yet.

For randomness’s sake, I’m dredging up a post I wrote on this very same day last year that was published on my MySpace. I will probably be going back through and censoring old posts on this site and elsewhere, so enjoy the freedom of writing while you can. ;) “Gather ye rosebuds while ye may” and all that rot.

Feel free to fill this out for yourself if you’d like -

August 3, 2007 - Ten (10) random things about me:

1) I over analyze almost everything and place situations side by side (relationships, work, etc) comparing past to present almost constantly. It’s maddening.
2) Adults are just like little kids. The most important thing is having people be legitimately pleased and proud of something you’ve done. This applies to me.
3) Money is important to me, but it’s far less important than the strange and magical sense that there is so much more in the world, like literature, and understanding, and human contact and the passion that comes with that.
4) I must have a puppy.
5) I miss TeXaS!!!!
6) I know I am not happy with my life when I am lethargic, which I have been lately. I also have an upset stomach almost every day that I go to work.
7) I haven’t written anything for my novel in 3 months. I think it has a lot to do with the fact I have no moral, and it feels empty. Speaking of writing, I am constantly blown off by the one place I was published that actually paid me. I told them to remove me from their list. Now I hope they fail.
8) Hence, I must have a mean streak. I constantly have to tell myself I am a good person. Half the time I believe it.
9) I will always be skeptical of people. I am usually always right. My wariness makes people think I am a bitch. They are almost always wrong.
10) Justin and I are in the same building almost 100% of the time.

Tags: Family, my past, Photography, Texas, travel, Vanessa