life
Letter to God, Letter to the World
Friday, July 25th, 2008 | Popular, Positivity | 0 Comments
Dear God, World, Universe, Energy – whatever is out there…
I want to create and live off of my creations. I want to create by myself. I want to create with other people. I want to write, sing, make movies (documentaries for now). I want to help others get published and get published myself. I want to take photographs and sell them. I want Justin and I to take photographs together and travel the world. I want to make videos with Val! and have a following of people that are genuinely interested. I want us to be able to sustain a nice living off of these projects. I want to create, love and be happy – and I want the same for my loved ones and all those that want this for themselves, too.
I want life to be “how it should be.” A community of good people, good friends, creating, enjoying, being out there in the world and really living and experiencing it all.
Thanks for the thunderstorm the other night. That was a great birthday present. And thanks in advance, for the future.
Love,
Ness
“one of these days all we’ll do is create and live off of it, and travel and enjoy it all”
‘Home’ – New
Monday, July 14th, 2008 | Adventure | 0 Comments
I returned this morning from a long weekend in Texas. I was sooo glad to be back in Justin’s cozy, safe, sensual embrace. New York with Justin, I realize, is my true, comfortable home right now. However, over the past few days I’ve had a chance to explore different concepts of what home means and where it lies.
This weekend had it’s ups and downs, but the theme of the weekend certainly was nostalgia. Memories, photos, video tapes were all unearthed and discussed. Despite my exhaustion (hours slept over the last few nights: 3, 6, 6, and 3) from the last few days, I managed to write 14 pages in my little blue book I always carry with me when I boarded the plane this morning. I then proceeded to sleep the entire rest of the way. It’s really nice to reflect, to dissect, and to return to a comfortable, loving life. I might type up some of what I wrote, but I am not sure yet.
Ponderings in the Shower
Friday, July 4th, 2008 | Thoughts | 0 Comments
Written July 2, 2008: I moved to New York City so I could become complacent with my life. My life here is no bigger or smaller than it’s ever been – neither more nor less important.
In a way, it *feels* a little bigger because of this enormously populated, exaggeratedly important city. Everyone knows of it, speaks of it, longs to be here for one reason or another even if they’re at the furthest corners of the world. Movies are filmed here, books are written here, tv shows are shot here… It’s definitely recognizable, and being even slightly affiliated with a place so well-known and lusted after makes my life feel just a millimeter more significant.
But in other ways, I am much more isolated in this cut-throat, self-serving, me-first sort of city. I lost it the other night, crying to Justin and wondering if I’d ever have any real friends again.
July 4, 2008: Happy birthday, Michieru. Hope you’re making the most of it!
